Wonderfully Made

Psalm139:13 For you formed my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

As a kid this verse kinda freaked me out. The thought of a gooey baby being formed was something I really didn’t want to think about.

As an adult though I prayed for those moments of being pregnant and for God’s hands to form life. It didn’t exactly happen that way for me. The children I prayed for were formed in another women’s womb. Yet I know that God had His hand on every moment.

This verse has come up several times to me this week. I’m not entirely sure why.

I love it because the verse to me talks about God loving us even before we were born. Psalm 139 talks about God knowing us and how he is with us. How we are wonderfully made.

As a kid the thought of God being with us made me feel better about certain situations, and scared me about others. I remember telling my mom I didn’t want Him in the bathroom when I was taking a shower. Looking back, I’m not sure how she didn’t laugh hysterically at me. I was genuinely concerned of God seeing me naked. I can’t remember my mom’s exact words but it was something like “God doesn’t want to see you naked sweetie, he’s with you protecting you, but not staring at you.”

My kids have the opposite problem that I had though – I have a hard time to get them to stop streaking down the hall from the bathroom. My four year old is the worst. If Bella has trouble getting part of her outfit on she just comes down to the kitchen to ask for help. She doesn’t care how many people are in the kitchen or if they are even related.

We are constantly trying to teach her modesty but it hasn’t quite kicked in yet. I know modesty has to start at a young age. Sometimes though it is so hard not to laugh. Like when my two year old manages to get out of his towel after a shower and he just loves to run! Nico thinks streaking around it the best thing since sliced bread.

Anyway bringing it back to a point. The God of the universe knit us together. He has loved you and your children since before your birthdays. We need to remember this. We need to remember that we were beautifully made and God loves us. Even through all our sticky parenting moments. And He loves our children through all of their sticky (or streaking) moments.

Little Hands

My two year old son has the cutest little hands. He cannot say any words but when he is ready to go somewhere he will take his little hand and put it into mine and lead me to where he wants me to go.

He loves to cuddle. When his little body is sitting on my lap he takes his hand and wraps it around my finger.

My heart treasures these moments. I want to capture the feeling in my heart forever. For I know these moments don’t last.

I was entrusted in raising these beautiful little creatures and I know all too well that they grow so fast.

My oldest child is fifteen. Fifteen sounds so old. Once upon a time she was this cute little six year old that thought I had all the answers. Now she is a beautiful fifteen year old that thinks I’ve forgotten all the answers. So quickly it all changes.

(I know you parents of toddlers can’t wait till your days of diapers are in the past! Yes there really are those days that kids do not feel like a “reward” but quite the opposite. I assure you though it goes quick.)

Thinking about how we are all God’s children I wonder sometimes if He thinks about us the same way we think about our kids? When we are precious and little, He is there with us comforting us in the scary long nights. Does God hold on to those moments when we are pain in the butt teenagers? And as teens does He think “I am going to use this tenacity in about five years kid. Try to curb it if you can.” Then years later when we have our own kids is God trying to show us that we really aren’t in control?

He’s got this. He’s got our kids. Just as he has us.

I know that my little two year old son will tower over me as my fifteen year old does. One day cuddling in my lap will look like a joke. So I’m trying so hard to hold on to these moments. Sometimes I wish I could tell God to slow down time. Let me just enjoy a moment more. Yet I know he has bigger plans than for this cute little two year old to stay in my lap. I know I have to raise them to be lights in this world. To lead by example with good character. It seems unfair that I only get them for such a short period of time.

I feel like motherhood is full of mood swings. One moment I’m scolding them for drawing on each other and the next I’m holding them tight never wanting to let go. This sentimental feeling I have right now will be stomped upon by some mischief. But right now I just want to savor this moment. Tomorrow I will deal with the marker.